Changing

“Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change.” ― Jim Rohn

It's that time of the year again. The time when we all pull out our journals and reflect back on the adventures taken, lessons learned and memories created from the past year. As we reproduce fondly (or cringe) on the moments of the past 360-ish days of yesteryear, we start to think about what we can do different next year. How can I make more money? How can I be happier? What do I need to rid of in my life in order to succeed? How can I fit back into my size 4 jeans? Because we are closing out on another year, we are all of a sudden inspired for changes and motivated about the possible outcomes.When I was a trainer, I knew I couldn't change people. I can help them and encourage them to lose weight, but I always knew that in order for them to live and believe in a healthy lifestyle, it has to come from within. YOU have to want to change. YOU have to want to eat better. YOU have to want to fit in those jeans from 2 years ago. I can only guide you and inspire you, but that want, desire and effort has to come from your heart.Goal setting is fantastic, but the the problem with setting goals and creating New Year's Resolutions is that they can only last for so long. They only last for as long as we stay motivated. When your motivation and drive starts to wain, because... well LIFE, then we fall back into that vicious circle of "I"ll try again next year." Then next year comes and instead of vowing to lose 5 lbs., you set yourself up to lose 10, because you gained 5 more. Or instead of enjoying your dream job, you're new goal is to go on vacation from life because you basically gave up on trying to find your dream job. It's a constant battle of excitement and disappointment until you either actually hit your goal or you give up.So why not try something different this year? Instead of committing yourself to a New Year's Resolution and setting new goals, why not commit to YOURSELF and YOUR personal growth and development? Instead of learning a new hobby or sport, learn about yourself and who you really are. Figuring out your purpose and your why is a new concept I've been working on. Amazingly, it has lead me into different paths and ideas that I never thought I would ever explore. I'm still trying to hone in on my "why" but I'm a lot closer to that then I was a few months ago.For 2018, instead of making a New Year's Resolution that you'll probably break by mid January, I invite you to accept who you are now and be curious about everything. Step out of your comfort zone. Do that thing you've been wanting to do, but haven't for the fear of whatever. Be bold in you actions and find self-love.Goals are a lot easier and more fun to accomplish when our foundation is strong. You are perfect the way you are, have fun figuring out who that person is.

YSL

Almost 2 years to date, I blogged about my first pair of Louboutins. It was a very proud and accomplished moment in my life. I was able to treat myself to something beautiful and expensive. I've only worn them once (because they are insanely painful), but damn they make my legs look nice... haha.... BUT, it was the start of my designer shoe collection.

In the early part of 2016, I created a vision board. On that vision board, I pasted a picture of a pair of Yves Saint Laurents. I knew exactly what I wanted,  Tribute 105 Sandals in nude. I love that classic shoe and its versatility. You can dress it up or dress it down and you will still look gorgeous. For so long I stared at my vision board pining for those shoes. I finally got them.

Aren't they just beautiful???

Ok.

So as 40 Days Elevate starts to wrap up, I can't help but to reflect on what I've been working on and how much has changed since Day 1.My intentions for these 40 days was to come out of it "ok." I've been on this non-stop emotional rollercoaster called life that did not seem to end. In the past, I've always managed to work my way through things, but this time everything that I tried did not work. Vacations, exercise, eating, and even laughing couldn't bounce me back.But here we are.... Day 37 and I actually woke up OK. That anxiety ridden depression of waking up wasn't there. I actually felt content with my life at that moment and was OK with whatever I have in store for me today.It's been a long road, but here's what I've learned.

1. BE PATIENT, especially with the people you love. - Everything really has its course. People must experience things in order to get to where they need to be. Just because someone isn't at your level, it doesn't mean it's your responsibility to get them there. Let people be, they will eventually come around. Change your attitude towards their struggles and pray for them so that you can help to elevate them instead of fight with them to change.
2. Love yourself. - This was the biggest one for me. In order to be able to love others, you must learn to love yourself. Loving yourself is about taking care of yourself physically and especially mentally. Sacrificing who you are for the happiness of others is not showing love to people, it's only a way to allow them to abuse you. Love yourself enough that people can reflect that love off of you and onto their lives.
3. The way you are treated is a reflection of yourself. - Feeling angry inside? Don't be surprised that people will be angry with you all day. Being sarcastic? Don't get butt hurt when people sarcastically answer your simple question. Just like a bouncy ball, our moods can bounce off other people and come right back to us. Keep that in mind the next time you're in a  bad mood.
4. Just breathe. - Cliché I know, but deep breathes in stressful situations really does calm your nerves. There's some sort of magical effect when you take a moment to bring more oxygen to your system. Those few moments of deep breathes will help you to relax and think more clearly before reacting to a stressor.
5. This too shall pass. - Eventually the rain does stop. Just because you're going through hard times, it doesn't mean it will be forever. The tough situations we are put in is an opportunity for growth. As hard as this shit can get, HOLD ON because it does get better. Feel the feels, but know there's a light at the end of the tunnel.

Just like me, eventually you'll be OK too.