Updates

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It's been a while. So much has happened since my last post. I have so many ideas that run through my mind all the time, I'm not sure why I never give myself time to just sort it out through journaling. So here's a quick update on my life:

  • Coco my little Malshi (Maltese/Shihtzu mix) is now in my life, she weighs 4lbs.
  • I started working on my next project, Third Coast Creamery
  • I started working on my side hustle as well: OhCheezus!
  • I actually really enjoy cooking, even though I'm not really good at it
  • Sticky's Chicken brick and mortar is almost done
  • I don't exercise as regularly as I use to
  • My hair is pink

I'm not sure why my domain isn't working right now, but as soon as it's up and running again, I will definitely do a better job blogging, even if no one really reads my thoughts.

Growing

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I thought I was growing.

I thought I was stronger than the person I was last year.

I thought I've already dug up my deep hidden emotions and dealt with it.I thought I was ready to take over the world.

If that's the case....Then why do I sit here sad and crying.

Why am I feeling sorry for myself because I chose this path.

Why does it hurt so much, when you didn't even do anything to hurt me.

I thought holding back would save me the pain, it totally backfired and now I'm left to pick up the pieces again.

I'm told constantly that I'm a strong, independent person, but why do I feel so week and vulnerable? What does it even mean to be strong?

Again.

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Here we go again.This feeling in the pit of my stomach is all too real right now. I'm sadly familiar to this feeling and I can't simply ignore it. Every time I try to ignore this feeling, it comes back to bite me in the ass.Yes, I like you. Is the feeling mutual? Who knows. Again, I'm given confusing signals that can be interpreted in numerous ways.I don't like confusion.I don't like grey area.I don't like wishy-washy.I like honesty.I just simply have to remind myself that I have a lot on my plate and I can't allow my feelings into this mess. I don't have the emotional capacity to deal with this right now.Stay strong, Patsy Anne. You've come this far, let's see how much further you can go.